It is a terrible thing to get drunk at a baseball game

It is a terrible thing to get drunk at a baseball game

Joseph Verhelle

Illustration by Jason David Córdova

But I do it anyway––
because we’re down three – nothin’
after the first inning.
 
And while I roast
in the 300 section
with my Walmart jersey-shirt
sticking to my skin,
 
I draft a sloppy email 
to my season ticket rep,
who likes to give me tours
of sections I can’t afford.
 
Dear Mr. Richardson,
This team has made more errors today 
than beers I’ve ordered from the Miller Light Lounge.
And that’s saying a lot, because we both know
I’ve had a lot of beers. I’d like you to cancel
my season tickets, as I’ve decided to prioritize 
my mental health by drinking in my basement
with the spiders and more importantly, without baseball. 
 
But I don’t send it, 
because in the bottom of the seventh,
the sunlight reflects off the bald head 
of the first base coach and suddenly,
I believe we’ll be World Series champs once again.


Joseph Verhelle is a poet and educator from Rochester Hills, Michigan. His work is forthcoming in Heavy Feather Review. He hopes the Detroit Tigers will win the World Series before he dies.

Jason David Córdova lives in Puerto Rico as an illustrator and painter. Some of his art can be seen on Instagram at @jasoni72. You can visit his shop on Red Bubble.

The Twin Bill is a nonprofit organization with 501(c)(3) tax-exempt status. You can support The Twin Bill by donating here.